“God is a comedian, playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.””
H. L. Mencken
In a rather unsettling development, an Indian religious leader has now debuted on the world stage in such a (not quite unbridled) tour de force of spiritual empowerment that I must retract every word I’ve ever spoken or published and go find honest work. My operating assumption has always been “If truth be with us, who can be against us?”, and now I know. Sorry for wasting your time. In farewell, I refer you to a true spiritual master, ripped, torn, yanked from today’s headlines:
Religious leader called Penis Baba pulls car 100ft using only his MANHOOD while stunned crowds watch
Huge crowds flocked to watch a religious leader appear to pull a car – with his penis. The ‘monk’ – known only as Penis Baba – can be seen fiddling under his robes while he apparently attaches a rope to his private parts. After the white rope is tied to the car before he staggers backwards, pulling the heavy vehicle around 100ft. ‘Baba’ said: “It is not art. It is the power of God – the power of devotion. “Any person can go to any extent by doing devotion.”
Obviously, no one can claim to be an enlightened spiritual master if they can’t pull at least a stacked washer/dryer set with their tethered member. Now that a true spiritual master has appeared in the world, I will retire and not return until I can not only pull a car in so notable a manner, but squat, clean and jerk it as well.
On second thought, I’m not really a big devotion guy so maybe I’ll just stick with the truth angle and leave the Indian rope tricks to the fakirs.
Let’s start the book.
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